I once found a seagull with an arrow through its neck lying on the ground. A protected species but the arrow made its mark. I got the point. At least head not in a jar with jam on face. Which is worse suffocation or unable to swallow? Donations accepted to seagulls society for battered birds.
Seagulls are not entirely benign creatures. Just sayin’… I just returned from Rome. Seagulls control Rome now. If you think that sounds crazy, it is. But it’s also true. Loud as fuck in the middle of the night, extremely aggressive. Will kill all sorts of smaller animals - pigeons, rats if tourist restaurant garbage supplies run short. Will attack humans. The road to hell is paved with good intentions.
I came here for the wanking and all I got was a chicken sandwich? So disappointed 😉
Life do be like that.
I love nonfiction.
Well, this was quite a good wank of a story!
I once found a seagull with an arrow through its neck lying on the ground. A protected species but the arrow made its mark. I got the point. At least head not in a jar with jam on face. Which is worse suffocation or unable to swallow? Donations accepted to seagulls society for battered birds.
I still remember reading this first on Medium. Back then, I thought: "This guy is strange." Fortunately, I like things that are strange.
Insanely funny. Can't look at a deli sandwich without wondering whether its wank worthy.
“Which of these sandwiches do you think is most wank worthy?” 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 great read 👍👍
Great story—Loved it!
Seagulls are not entirely benign creatures. Just sayin’… I just returned from Rome. Seagulls control Rome now. If you think that sounds crazy, it is. But it’s also true. Loud as fuck in the middle of the night, extremely aggressive. Will kill all sorts of smaller animals - pigeons, rats if tourist restaurant garbage supplies run short. Will attack humans. The road to hell is paved with good intentions.
https://www.wantedinrome.com/news/seagull-attacks-on-the-rise-in-rome.html
Amazing, really loved that, thank you
Came for the seagull picture stayed for the sandwich wank. This has given me faith in Substack again. Top notch
Thank you. They say laughter is the best medicine. Well, I laughed my ass off about a half dozen times reading that post.
A lovely story
Frank, I just love you. You make me smile, which is awkward as I try to balance heavy dumbbells over my head. Chest day today...and no wanking.
Great story Frank..
Keep em coming
I love real.life reflections.
Brings back memories.
I'm pretty sure I got wanked off in an alley too but I can't remember when I did it either!
Hedgehog Harry
Was it better than the Glory Hole?